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Archive for April, 2009

If You Really Need A Dating Quiz, Maybe You Shouldn’t Be Dating

April 20th, 2009

by: Brian Fong

Q. My boyfriend failed a dating quiz. Should I dump him?

A. If you’re the type that hates to be dumped, then you should dump him before he finds out that you even asked this question. If you put so much value on a dating quiz that you’re willing to break off a relationship because someone “failed” it, then maybe you’re not ready for dating yet.

You see, a dating quiz is written for entertainment purposes only. I’m not trying to be sexist here, but they are usually written for girls and young woman, and they are designed to prey upon your natural insecurities. They are biased towards some unrealistic viewpoint of what the perfect partner is and the perfect partner doesn’t exist.

I remember a dating quiz that asked if my girlfriend reached over to unlock the driver’s door after I let her into the passenger door. If I answered “Yes” then she would make a perfect wife. If I answered “No” then I should run away!

Come on, get real. If that’s all it took to be a perfect wife there would never be any divorces.

My point, at the risk of repeating myself, is that a dating quiz shouldn’t be taken seriously. In fact, there is a good chance that they shouldn’t be taken at all. Your common sense knows whether or not you are dating someone who is good or bad for you. You don’t need some overworked writer, working against a deadline to fill up some white space in a magazine, or on a web site, to tell you whether or not you should dump someone on the basis of your answers to a dating quiz. Not if you’re anyone who is worth dating, that is.

Online Dating

Change Your Dating Reality

April 19th, 2009
by: David LeVine

I want to share with you the key to finding the Right One and getting married the quickest way possible — guaranteed.

It’s not hard, doesn’t cost any money, and takes only about one minute a day. You already have all the tools you need to make it happen, you just need to apply this for one minute every day.

What will guarantee that you find the Right One and get married the quickest way possible? A key ingredient is to believe in yourself, and I am going to show you why it works, and how to do it the right way.

The word “manifest” means to turn a thought into a thing. Everything you see around you — cars, houses, the table, a pen — were all once thoughts that someone turned into a real object. When you manifest something, you make it appear in the real world. Now as a single person, you have an idea that you want to get married, and what you want to do is manifest that idea into reality, to be standing under the marriage canopy.

A key underlying force that allows you to manifest an idea into reality is to believe you can do it. We can all relate to times where the situation looked bad, but through sheer will and determination people beat insurmountable odds.

Consider a life-and-death scenario of being out in the wilderness alone. Gordon Smith, an instructor who spent 26 years in the U.S. Army’s Special Forces, says: “If you have a guy with all the survival training in the world who has a negative attitude, and a guy who doesn’t have a clue but has a positive attitude, I guarantee you that the one with the positive attitude is coming out of the woods alive.

This heightened motivation of people in dire situations appears to be the force that gets them through. But that’s not the whole story. The amazing thing is what happens behind the scenes, the real secret to success. There is a stronger metaphysical component at work here.

Remember the Six Day War and the Yom Kippur War? The tiny State of Israel was surrounded by hostile Arab countries numbering over 200 million people. What happened? The Arab countries should have wiped Israel off the map in short order. Instead, Israel beat them all. Miracle!

We call it a miracle when we see a dramatic change in reality. In those wars we see an obvious change of reality — how God changed a pending defeat into complete victory.

On a smaller scale, you can use the same principle to guarantee that you will get married quickly. Let’s explain:

When you believe in something, the sheer force of your will can give God reason to support your goal. Based on your belief, God actually changes reality to make the thing that you want come about. For example: You want to get married, and if you believe with total conviction that you will find the Right One, then God can take your will and actually change reality to cause your soul mate to come to you.

Let’s look at the source of this idea, a story in the Talmud (Taanit 8a) about “The Weasel and the Pit.” In the story, a young man promised to marry a certain woman. She asked: “Who will be the witness to this pledge?” The only things in the area at the time were a pit, and a weasel walking by. With no other option and in all sincerity, the young man said that the weasel and the pit should be the witnesses.

Time went by, and the young man forgot his pledge. Then he began experiencing serious hardships — each time involving a weasel or a pit. In the end, he realized why these things were happening, and resolved to keep his pledge. He married the woman, and the misfortunes stopped.

Rabbi Chaim Shmulevitz gives insight on how this works. Obviously, the weasel and the pit have extremely limited powers. Yet when the young man initially designated them to be his witnesses, God took his sincerity into account and actually changed the reality to give the weasel and the pit the ability to uphold the promise.

The same principle is true for you. If you really believe in something, God may change reality so that it comes about.

However, this powerful idea is a double-edged sword. Just as it can work to your benefit, it can be to your detriment by bringing about something that is bad for you. Let’s say you meet a really great person on a date, and decide that you absolutely, positively must marry this person.

In reality, though, you may be temporarily infatuated with this person, and in fact they are really bad for you — and marrying them will be a disaster. Yet if you will it hard enough, and are over-insistent, it is possible that God will allow you to marry that wrong person.

That’s why, when you are dating, you should always ask God to help you marry the “right person” and not any specific person.

To summarize, there are two ways you can use this principle positively:

1) Believe in yourself.

If you truly believe that you will find the Right One and get married, then God can change the reality to make it happen.

2) Ask God to bring you the Right One.

The key here is to ask for “the Right One,” and not “that one.”

On a practical level, you need to make your belief real, by manifesting this idea — everyday, once a day, for one minute.

Here’s how to do it:

1) Say out loud: “I am ready to get married now. I am ready to meet him/her today. I am committed to being a giver in the relationship, rather than a taker.”

2) Make one small effort to find them: Check for the newest members on a dating website. Call a matchmaker. Signup for a Speed Dating event. Call a friend and tell them what you are looking for.

Small, consistent steps is the key to success. “By the inch it’s a cinch, by the yard it’s hard.” Meaning, if you take one small action every day, your small efforts turn out to be significant over time. You don’t need to work hard, just be consistent.

The more consistent you are, the more you reinforce your belief. By saying positive statements and making small efforts, you send a bigger message to God, who can make it happen.

One of my mom’s favorite sayings is, “Think big, be big.” And it is very true.

“Think marriage, get married.”

Dating Reality

Celebrity Makeup Artist Reveals Colorful Tips for the New Year

April 19th, 2009
by: ARA

(ARA) – Looking for ways to add vibrancy this New Year? Makeup artist Roxanna Floyd, artist to stars such as Queen Latifah, Angela Bassett, Janet Jackson and more, gives expert advice on maximizing your color palette for 2009:

Try a Trend — Always wanted to sprinkle on the glitter? Been looking for a reason to wear false eyelashes? Put those trends to the test this New Year by wearing a sparkly nail polish to your weekend brunch, or a shimmery body lotion to your best friend’s dinner party.

An Eye For Cool — Wear a shimmery, sheer look with crème-to-powder, waterproof eye shadows in breakthrough colors, such as MK Signature Eyesicles which comes in three trendy limited edition colors: Cherry Cola, Mermaid (green) and Pink Frost. You can toss these compact colorful tubes into a small purse to take your look from office to evening.

New Year, New You! Introduce the playful side of your beauty personality this year! Surprise those around you by wearing a playful hair extension or colored mascara to the next celebration. A flirty, beaded necklace and earrings completes the look.

Perfect your pout. Using the proper lip liner and lipstick can make a drastic difference to your smile. The MK Signature Lip Outliner Pencil is a new translucent lip outliner that prevents lipstick or lipgloss from bleeding or feathering when used before application. Keep your pout perfect by applying a moisturizing lipstick with delicious colors like Mary Kay’s Luscious Color Lipstick in Apricot Glaze or Whipped Berries. Both lip products average between $12 and $15.

Nourish your skin with an emollient-rich moisturizer. The chill of the air can chap cheeks and dry out the skin, so protect it during the day with a moisturizer that contains an SPF of at least 15. Some sunscreens are even tinted, giving skin a natural glow and flawless finish. Remember to cover the neck and ears, too, even in the winter.

Adding color is a simple way to transform yourself this year, and also makes it easy to go from daytime radiance to evening glamour. For more information on products to create an updated look for 2009, call your Independent Beauty Consultant, or locate one at (800) Mary Kay or www.marykay.com.

Online Dating